The winter dilemma

It’s that time of year again. The trees are shedding their golden leaves, the clocks have been put back, geese are flying south; the mornings are crisp and the evenings misty. Thoughts turn to Halloween, Bonfire Night, even, dare I say, Christmas … and the winter bugs have started circulating. Beautiful ... but a harbinger …

Fake it ’til you make it

Someone once told me that, however bad you're feeling, simply smiling will make you feel happier. It’s to do with the physical action of moving your face muscles triggering neural pathways involved in emotion. Or something. I don't know whether it’s scientifically proven, anecdotal, or just bullshit. Anyway, I wonder if the same can be …

In the shadow of Storm Brian

“You on your own then?” (I hasten to add this isn't a #metoo story; this was a genuine expression of surprise/concern). “Well my husband will be here soon [before it bloody rains, selfish ****]. He's cycling from Scotland.” “Ah (eyeing the back end of a five year old that has already spotted a rabbit and …

When you love church but your child hates it

The Christian Church is far from perfect. I, and my family, are so lucky to have found in St Anne's a small branch that is growing, thriving, outward-focused, community-centred, accepting, caring and inclusive. We are fortunate that Benjamin, although 'complex,' is not 'challenging.' Yet I am confident that, even if he were noisy, disruptive, violent, …

Brought up short

She pulls her knees right up to her tummy, froggy-style, then kicks them straight again, quickly, over and over, learning the strength in those chubby little thighs. She’ll be rolling over soon. His legs are sometimes floppy, sometimes tense and rigid. He doesn’t move them voluntarily; they will likely never bear his weight. She brings …

A day in the life

As a change from my standard, introspective musings, I thought I might try and describe a typical day in our household. Of course, there is no typical day. Some days we have appointments for Ben, some days we have playdates for Jackie; some days Ben is sleepy all day, some days he is hungry all …

Hope and expectation

I think it’s only fair that before I go any further I explain properly why I’m writing this blog. So, I need to take you back to last November. We were 38 weeks into an uneventful pregnancy, excited about the prospect of meeting our second child. Then, at the end of a very long Friday, …

Number three

I’ll admit it, I’m broody. I’m desperate for another baby. Another normal baby. I want it for myself – although I love him to bits – because I feel deprived of that wonderful experience of watching a child learn, grow, and develop day by day. And I want it for my little girl – although …

The slow smile

It’s an amazing moment when your baby smiles for the first time. It’s also amazing when they do that first, definite, personal smile, the one that says, “That’s my mum, I know her, I trust her and I love her.” With my first child, it happened after a few weeks. This time, it took seven …